Tuesday, November 1, 2011

One in the ovary is worth two in the...no, wait...um....

So, got my scan on yesterday at the doctor's office.  It showed me what I was already expecting.  No, not expecting like that, expecting as in I just knew it.  I've gotten so accustomed to seeing the ultrasound machine images of my girl parts that I knew exactly what she was (or wasn't) seeing.

See, in the past, when they've done our scan, we've gone through the measuring of the endometrium lining - which was just mediocre since Clomid tends to thin your lining out a little bit - and then onto the ovaries.  It's a routine all infertile couples go through and figure out and grow accustomed to seeing.  How many of you think you could do your own scan at this point?  Well, with a little help unless you're like Gumby.  Anyway, through the grainy black and white, you're able to distinguish your triple stripe, then the dark circles come into view and you can almost immediately tell what you're going to be dealing with for that cycle.  It's reassuring to see those little black blobs show up because you know that something is working properly for a change.  At least that is how I feel.  Usually.

On Clomid, my body responded well.  No hot flashes, no mood swings, nothing.  I've actually felt happier while on Clomid.  Odd huh?  Dr. S thought so.  Anyway, we've seen follies as big as 33 mm across.  We've seen them as small as about 11 mm.  We've never seen less than three follicles that were "mature" and once, I think we had about five that were good, mature, healthy possibilities.  I've always been pleased with that (other than the scary big #33).  So, there I sat (laid) yesterday, on CD11, looking at the screen, seeing my ultra thick, luscious lining (ok, so the Anastrazole did do that right) and just waiting to see if my body had liked the new medicine as much as the old medicine.  She went straight to the right ovary and the black and white grainy business never changed...just more black and white graininess.  She wiggled the DC around and finally, two little marbles appeared that were just tiny.  She didn't even measure them they were so small.   She said something about the right ovary not looking too promising and moved over to the left side.  After just a second, our one follicle popped up on the screen.  Nothing too dramatic, it measured about 16mm on CD11 so in another few days, who knows where it'll be.  We've had two follicles in the past grow about 6-8 mm overnight so we're hoping this little follie will grow a little more, but not too much.

Rik says he feels pretty good about this little guy.  He even tossed out the idea that maybe he is just such a tough and scrappy little follie that he ate the other follies and he's the last one standing.  King of the hill style.  I couldn't help but smile.  My husband knows just what to say sometimes.  Dr. S asked us to pee on a stick the next few evenings and once we come up with a positive OPK, we can either do another IUI and hope our one follicle is a good one (it only takes one) or she can give us our trigger shot and we can do the IUI then.

Here are my thoughts (as if this whole novella isn't already full of my thoughts), I don't know if we should drop the moolah on an IUI when we had such a poor showing of follicles (no offense to my one little scrapper) because technically, couldn't I do this much on my own?  How much will it tip the scale in our favor?  I have no problem ovulating.  It's getting the two key ingredients together to make an...um.....omelet maybe?  What takes two ingredients? ok, I can't think of a good food analogy here, but you get the point.  Something fantastic.

Maybe I've just answered my own question though....I love blogging.  The IUI would give those two key ingredients their best chance to get together and make something wonderful.  Since that seems to be the problem, maybe the IUI is the answer.  Especially if in the past, the endometriosis was making this process tougher and has now been eliminated.  I was just feeling like we should try on our own, call this month a loss and jump back in with both feet next month.  While we're dropping the money on this, I want to give us our best chance possible, ya know?

ergh...I don't know what to do.  Rik said he thinks if we don't do this cycle just because of the money factor, we'd regret it later and he's probably right.  It does just take one egg.  And it's not like the other months (with all their glory) have been successful.  I do find it ironic though that my left ovary is so active.  Always the bigger producer, also the one with the cyst and now 3 weeks after surgery on it, it's our only shot.  Show off.

So, what do you ladies (& Doc) think we should do?  I need some advice.  Also, Dr. S said that for next month, if we're unsuccessful this month, we'll either go back to Clomid and some type of injectable or do the Anastrazole in combination with something else.  I don't remember exactly what she said though because once she said "injectable" I pretty much heard nothing but horror film music the remainder of the visit.''   Ugh.  Solo pronto!  I guess....

In other news, Rik has already finished a new post for all you gals (& Doc) but I had to post this before I posted his so that I don't feel like such a slacker.  Also, all grammatical errors can be chalked up to the fact that THIS little lady won't stop pawing my arm and dropping her ball on my lap.  How can I resist this face?


Tess is a jealous creature.

10 comments:

  1. Thanks for the e-mail...so sweet and true. Two peas in a pod!

    It's so hard to know what to do isn't it. It's like, I'll spend whatever you want if you guarantee me a damn baby, but I don't want to be the one to make the call not knowing the outcome. I had the same situation where I would only produce one good follicle a month (you know, the same one my body is supposed to be producing on it's own anyway). I guess it's just more of the timing that you gain with going thru with the IUI. The fact that your husband thinks it might be something you'll regret not doing may make it worthwhile just so you don’t' always wonder. Plus, what a good story if this is the one that does the trick and you were on the fence but eventually decided to go through with it. :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. My two cents: we only had one egg and we now have a bouncing baby boy. It only takes one good egg. And after spending the money on the meds for the cycle, the cost of the IUI was so MINIMAL compared to everything else our doctor said it would be silly NOT to spend the couple hundred to wash the spermies and help them get to the right spot.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thank you ladies.... Oak, that is what I was kind of thinking too the more I thought about it. It's encouraging to hear your story. :) That makes me grin. I keep thinking it's more likely to fail with fewer follies instead of thinking of it more positively. I'm going to try to change my way of thinking.....my way of thinking stinks.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Damn Oak always steals my answers. So from now on if she gives you good advice, consider it my idea. Great. Anyway, congrats on being able to read your own u/s. I swear I always thought they were lying. I couldn't see shit.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ok, here's my advice. The one and only thing I ever felt confident about while TTC and going through all the meds, ultrasounds, procedures etc, was that every decision I've made was what my heart was telling me to do. For example, we had to make the choice of doing a long lupron cycle for the IVF I chose not to. Which was risky. But it was fine for us! Then we had to decide how many embryos to put back. 3 was scary, but I knew in my heart that it would be our best shot. And thank God we did, because we have one miracle growing. So I guess what Im saying is go with what your heart is telling you :) And wow, I never could tell what was going on with the follicles on the screen. They could have told me there was a squirrel in there munching on acorns and I would have believed them... :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Well, firstly, I can't believe you have never seen less than 3 mature follicles. That is amazing. I've never seen more and only saw 3 once and I thought I was an overachiever!

    Secondly, I'm in agreement with the others. Once I spent the money on meds and ultrasounds, the actual IUI cost felt like nothing. I realize it actually was something (about $500, but you get my point. It felt like we owed it to ourselves (and our bank account) to throw everything we could at the shot since we had already put so much in. You know?

    Thirdly, I agree. I am an ultrasound pro. It was so disheartening to be in my u/s and not have any mature follicles because there was no holding out hope for what the doc would say, I could see it plain as day. When there was something there, she didn't even need to say it. I was already celebrating. :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. I am so proud of you, you never cease to amaze me.

    ReplyDelete
  8. haha, short, sweet and to the point. I love it.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I know this is late, but I wanted to say that I'm glad you decided to go forward with the IUI, even with only 1 follie. We only had 1 mature follie at trigger time, but after the stress and time and cost of meds, it seemed crazy to NOT try the IUI. Honestly, they still aren't quite sure what's wrong with me (maybe lean PCOS, maybe unexplained) and I feel like allowing the sperm to skip that whole "getting to the uterus" part made a huge difference for us. Keep on keeping on - this WILL work for you!

    ReplyDelete